"Follow the Crowd" Mentality is Bullshit

A few months back, me and my family were watching the boobtube (its slang for television, not a kaleidescope of porn) and while my long-awaited show was already on air, my family was torturing me with local telenovelas and "reality" shows. Seriously, local shows here are so crappy that you might scratch your eyes out with the crappy, overused plot lines, shitty filming techniques, and the overacting actors, and people pay to watch these shit! Can you believe that?

I was so irritated I stated these points to my family, going on and on about how crappy our local shows are, how overidolized (is that a word? My computer says its not...) our actors are, and my rant even went to politics. I went on on how people just watch what others watch and believes in what others believe. My dad, who was an avid fan of the shows, probably got irritated and told me, "You're being a villain. If you keep going against the flow, you'll drown."

No disrespect to my father nor to anybody who also believes this, but that statement is full of crap.

Right now, there is about 20,000+ nursing graduates here in Manila looking for jobs in the US. The problem is, the US demand for nurses is already on the decline. Also, due to the recession, the US is probably avoiding unnecessary expenditures on overseas workers, so the thousands of nursing students hoping to get a good job abroad are now doomed to wandering around the streets, waving around their hard-earned diplomas. Even I have a cousin who is a very skilled artist who abandoned her dreams to obey her mother's advice on taking Nursing for college to land a good job abroad.

Most young people who are entering college is taking Nursing because it's the "hip" course, with most parents also advising to take the course, hoping that they are giving their children a good future abroad. Too bad they don't realize they are promoting what we call brain-draining, which is exporting all our professionals abroad, which is bad because while foreign countries pay us for exporting them, we are losing precious intellectuals who could actually make our country a better place with a better economy, which roughly translate to more cash for us.

People usually just follow without asking where the crowd is going. They believe that as long as there's a person in front of them, they'll be fine. The problem is, with somebody in front of you, you can't see what's ahead. If you just keep following the crowd, then all I can say is that you are a lazy fucker who can't think for himself. Yeah, there are times when you are lost that you should look for a crowd to follow for a while, but set out to venture on your own when you find your way. Don' waste life following zombies.

Two quotes for you: "Only dead fishes swim with the current," and "The way to Paradise is a narrow, untrodden road."

And for those filipino nursing students who entered your course for the reasons like your parents think it'll land you a good job abroad or that it's a "cool" course of the moment, back out NOW! It's not too late and you'll just be wasting years dissecting animals and wiping old people's asses.

Bliss in the age of sorrows...

I'm single, feeling sick, aware of the truth that I'm destined to die, have bad grades, considered a loner at school, starting to low on cash, etc-etc... But for some reason, I'm happy. I walk with weird gait, bang my head along to the rock music in my ears, and do facial reactions to everything around me (chicks, hobos, n00bs at arcade games, etc...) and I don't care even if people look at me.

I'm just glad that the sky is blue, I'm still alive, I have friends, and just being happy.

Life is harsh, and death is inescapable, but to waste life drowning yourself on negativity won't help lighten up the world. Want a better world? Start it yourself.

Btw, try walking around with a weird, optimistic look. Flex if you have to (in case you're born with a melancholy plastered in your face). Soon you'll be laughing at yourself, and so will be everybody around you. It may be embarrassing, but at least everybody will lighten up.

Logic, Emotions, and Anberlin

For about a week now, I've been wanting to play Anberlin songs on the drums, especially their song "Breaking" and "Paperthin Hymn". But no matter how I try, I don't feel like I'm playing right on the drums and the beat sound confusing to me. I watched drum covers from Youtube, and I wonder, "How come they can play it? Perhaps I'm not cut out to be a drummer...". I felt down and my confidence as a drummer went to smokes.


But I can play the songs now.



Why? Well, lemme start one of those "motivational speeches" everybody is doing on the TV and on self-help groups, but unlike theirs, mine is better (heh.)


It all boils down to this: Use your brain, you retard.


Okay, lemme be specific here. Use logic, you dumbass.


You can't play a song on the drums? Two words: Study and Practice. Watch covers from the internet and try to copy the way they play, then adjust according to what you feel is right, then practice it until you get it.

Girlfriend left you? Evaluate whether she is worth it or you're better off without her. If she's worth it, do whatever it takes to take her back. If she's just a slutty fuck-buddy that steals money from you, find yourself a more decent one.

You're fat? Exercise and quit the Twinkies and donuts. (Btw, sex is a good exercise because it builds up almost every part of your body and it burns calories faster than the thread mill. Just got this from readers digest, so don't look at me for more explanations.)

No money? Then get a fucking job, asshole.


Simply put, if you want 5, but you have 2, its obvious you add 3. Do what it takes to do it. The problem with us is we tend to rely too much on emotions like fear, hate, love, etc. I'm not saying having emotions are bad, when as a matter of fact its the thing that protects us from killing each other, but we should not let it blind us into making good decisions and improving ourselves.

Here's a good 4-step thought process.
-First, assess the situation, let say you got pregnant and you expect your parents to be mad and your guy to leave you.
-Next, think of the logical actions needed, like either talk it out with your guy then talk to your parents and look for support, or go the easy way out and do abortion.
-Only at step 3 should emotions, which are also affected by one's morality, be applied, like though your parents will be mad for a while, they'll soon understand, instead of killing the baby and harming your own body (yes, abortion is bad for the health.)
-Fucking DO IT! No matter how good an idea or how great your decisions are, it doesn't fucking work if you don't do it.


By the way, I can now play "Breaking" and I'm nearly perfecting "Paperthin Hymn", because mainly I'm awesome, and partially because I didn't give up. Fuck you, depression!

Death

Everybody hates the word... well, except for those poser emo basterds. Nobody wants to die. Simple as that. Nobody wants to fade away. Nobody wants to be forgotten. Nobody wants to know what's on the other side.

"Nobody" seems to want a lot, but this Great Nobody is better than just any nobody (or anybody?)




I just finished the epically-winning novel "Have a Little Faith", and the last of the four chapters in the book tackled Death. *Spoiler Alert* At that part of the novel, Mitch's rabbi, Rev. Albert "Reb" Lewis, is dying. He was in a semi-conscious state where he can barely mutter words, a sad thing to happen to the Reb who always love to sing. Truthfully, everybody (including I, the reader) expected that the Reb will die soon. Thankfully, the doctors were able to counter the disability and he soon returned to his energetic state, always with a mouthful of songs and wisdom. *Spoiler End* After a wonderful discussion, Mitch told his rabbi not to scare everyone again. The Reb quipped to "take it up with my Boss".

Why do seek more out of this life, when we have enough time to waste? Some people hated life, claiming it's too short, while some hate it for not ending sooner. But who are we to ask more? We were given something, and we have no right to ask more. Beggars can't be choosers, right? We also don't have the right to complain about our lives. I know some of you are saying that we didn't chose to live, but still, you did. It's not like you could just accept car, use it, then return it when it's used, saying you didn't want it.

Some people out there are even lucky to be born. In a Jewish myth, Adam, who was destined to live a thousand years, asked to see his future descendants. Out of many flames that signifies each soul, he found a warm, beautiful, orange flame, full of wisdom and valor. Adam asked God when that soul will be born, but God said it was decided that that soul will never be born, because it will soon commit sin and defile himself. Adam, who pitied his other descendants who will be deprived of knowledge from such a wonderful soul, begged God to take some years from his life and give it to that soul. Adam died at the age of 970, and many centuries later, the wise and powerful King David will die at the short age of 70. Without Adam's sacrifice, the world would have been deprived of such an amazing king. Isn't it better that we knew a person, even if it's just for a short moment, than not meeting him/her at all.


Personally, I don't want fame nor power, and I desire money just for the sole reason to buy things I like. I don't desire immortality, but my goal in life is to at least inspire others and that all my knowledge and wisdom to be passed on among the living. Perhaps even if my name is soon forgotten, my legacy will make a print into this world, giving me a small piece of immortality.



I do not know if there is Heaven or Hell or perhaps purgatory on the other side, nor do I know which of those places shall I wind up into. But as long as I have breath on my tar-filled lungs, I swear to God Almighty that I shall live as long as I can and inspire others to at least achieve my personal goal of leaving behind a legacy. You might think I'm selfish, but it's what we have to do in order to survive the painful trials of Life.


May Our God bless us all.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There's such a beautiful full moon tonight, and too bad I still can't see it from my window at the moment. I want to go to the rooftop and just look up to the beautiful works of God.

I want to feel the essence of tambay again, so I'll be smoking outside for a while.


~thegreatnobody got some of his cigarettes, and left the room.

Divine Knowledge, Fallen Angels, and Marlboro Black

Recently, I borrowed from my sister a copy of Mitch Albom's most recent magnum opus, "Have a Little Faith", which is about Mitch's personal account when his Jewish Rabbi, Albert Lewis, asked him to do him an eulogy. In the early chapters of the book, the author mentioned his background on his religion, where he said he studied more complicated materials like the Talmud and the Mystic Kabbalah.

The Jewish Kabbalah. Easy, right?

As I read on through the book, the author mention that though he has tons of theological knowledge inside his brain, he somehow found himself running away from God. The more you learn as life goes, you come to a slow realization that you don't need much from God, and as long as you're not doing harm to anybody, He doesn't need anything from you too. It's like that guy you met since first grade that, either through fate or coincidence, becomes your classmate all throughout until high school, and though you start out as buddies, you get into another group and only get to talk to that guy once every blue moon. You know the guy, you get along with him, but its just that you don't have enough (or maybe don't) make time to be with him. That's how the author's spiritual life went so far in the book.

And I also noticed that that's also how my spiritual life is slowly turning out to be.



Ever since my childhood, I've been reading picturebook bibles and learned much from them. By the time I started to read a real Bible, I pretty much already knew how the stories and tales would turn out to be. While the other kids are being thought and are trying to comprehend, I slowly developed a case of elitism where I always think "they are so slow" or "isn't it obvious?"or "they claim to know God, but not know of his works? Losers..." or even "I'm pretty sure they'll go to Hell". It's funny that the most knowledgeable on Holiness thinks of the most evil thoughts.

By the time I got to my last year in high school, I was looking for materials to make interesting plot lines when I hit the jackpot: Gnosticism, Mystic Judaism, and the Kabbalah. Did my research on them to use them for a story, and soon I got dragged into the world of the Gnostic Texts. Learned of the Archangels, Levels of Heaven, Magic Circles to Invoke Spirits... hell, I studied it so much to a point when I stuck a magic circle to invoke harm to somebody as a prank, he soon fell down a flight of stairs and almost broke his neck, not if I did it on the specific day the spell is at its most powerful. True magic or not, I soon engrossed myself in it, and I didn't notice it was taking over me.

When I went to a Encounter-God Retreat last April (or was it May? Can't remember), I felt hatred for every person there, thinking they will oppress my belief and preach to me their inferior knowledge on God (I still had traces of my elitism then). All I could think of at the time was protecting my beliefs, and that night, me and my other self (read my old posts, I'm sure I already told you about my split personality) fought over what to believe, and that night was when my other self felt most materialized. That whole retreat was a battle against myself and my beliefs, and it turns out that all I'm doing is not bad in itself, but my mindset was what's making what I'm doing evil. I got it all out of my system, and I managed to defeat my inner demon, but the war in me is still not over.

I believe in God, and I'm as theistic as any other out there. But I smoke. I curse. I still study some mysticism in my free time. I never lie, but still avoids the truth. I'm greedy. I masturbate in a frequent intervals to materials I'm never shy of talking about in public (It's porn). I make it my personal tandem to understand everybody, think of every standpoint, and not just loathe them for what I see them as, but I sometimes still judge people according to appearance and surface matters. The only thing I could be proud of out of all this is that I can say I'm not a hypocrite. I won't tell you what you should or shouldn't do, but I can only tell you to believe what you think is right, for everybody has the right to do so.

Personally I have only 2, no, 3 sins that makes a person legible for damnation:

Uselessness, or what Christians call the "sin of omission", meaning you failed to do what you the current situation calls you to. An example is premature ejaculation because, seriously, you're pretty much useless when you realize your partner is still horny and you already shot your load and can't get it up.

Cruelty, or the "sin of emission", things that hurt other people, either mentally, emotionally, or physically.

Well, the last one is stupidity, which is doing what you obviously should not do, but count that one as a joke. If your stupidity is done when you're not obliged to do anything and nobody is hurt, its not really a sin. Lighting up a 7 month old Marlboro Black Menthol falls under this one.


Like King Solomon said:

"The greater my wisdom, the greater my grief.
An increase to my knowledge is an increase to my sorrow"

-Ecclesiastes 1:18

Protip: Ignorance is a bliss, and don't smoke old cigarettes. Not only do they taste bad, but they give you weird inspirations.


I fail to kill enough zombies for my zombie contingency plan, so I'm gonna keep delaying it until I get enough knowledge and experience. Peace out.


~thegreatnobody proceeded in killing more zombies with his authentic, magic-enhanced Wakizashi-Ken